The Junk Food of Writing

Thursday, December 01, 2005

A public apology.

I sincerely apologize to you, oh faithful reader, for subjecting you to trite lyrics (and it was not even intentional, unlike those damn emo-bloggers who would rather regurgitate song lyrics than originally express their disdain for humanity through eloquent rants). Apparently, the title which appeared above the preceding entry was taken from, as I suspected, a terrible pop song. This fact was brought to my attention by my extremely-helpful-when-I-don't-want-her-to-be friend, Jacquelyn (thanks Jacq, for riddling me with crippling guilt). This particularly schmaltzy piece of derivative banality, "Follow Through," is sung by Gavin DeGraw. Yes, that young musician who is seen as a demi-god by millions of melodramatic teenagers and bored housewives. They most likely believe his 'chariot' can fly ala Apollo. Frankly, I hope his trajectory will eventually lead to the scalding sun. As most fans adorably sigh, "Gavin Derawwww" -- I appropriately shudder "Gavin Degrewwww." Yes, that is how damn sharp and clever I am. To my credit (if it is even feasible to establish any credit at this point), I actually paraphrased his lyrics. Now please, brace yourself as I forever taint my blog with the words of Mr. DeGr[e]www:

"Oh, this is the start of something good
Don't you agree?"

First off: No, Gav, I disagree. Secondly, there is a brilliant irony in these lyrics and my use of them. Gavin's prose possesses an almost haughty certainty ("This IS the start of something good" -- bettah recognize), while my rendition used the dubious "could," as if there was a possibility for failure. Clearly, however, Gavin is the one who has never started anything good, while I inexplicably emerge victorious.

What confounds me the most is -- how did I hear this song? Is it that ubiquitous? If so -- I have officially become a full-blown misanthrope. Seriously, I never deliberately listened to Gavin DeGraw; perhaps it was being played in a friend's car (such as Jacquelyn's) or in a supermarket, or in an elevator.

Since I enjoy using the media as an ever-available scapegoat, I am going to blame subliminal messages in the media. Vote for Bush. Drink Fanta. Hear Gavin DeGraw lyrics.

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