Listen up.

This is an announcement to those who like to raise their hand in the air, open their palm towards the person they are facing, and say "High five!":

Please don't do this to me. I have faced (false) accusations of racism and snobbery due to this silly, silly tradition.

In other news, I have discovered a small stage in the banquet room at the country club where I work. I am currently rounding up the 'Bamm Hollow players' and forcing them to perform an adaptation of Beckett/McCarthy's "Waiting for Godot, Our Waiter."

The startling success of that production will become my greatest accomplishment at work so far this summer -- usurping the time when I dryly convinced a coworker that I am into sadomasochism.

Ta ta.